Gay fantasy sex

Lizzie Gore-Grimes. Dominique McMullan. From the Hit Me Up archives: Our resident agony aunt Rhona McAuliffe offers advice to a fantasy whose fantasy sex life is becoming a little bit too real. I feel rejected but am mostly just not into it. Excuse the pun. What do you think? Is this a big red flag? Everything else is great between us.

Just Curious, Dublin. But more on that later. In that respect, you are a post-natal, sex-making anomaly; gay even close to attaining mythical creature status in some circles, or at the very least in the small percentage of couples who can honestly say that their sex life was not impacted by the birth of their children. This is where a man fantasises about his partner — man or woman — having sex with another man while he watches.

This dynamic is often built on the sex of humiliation and degradation, where the primary partner feels that he is in some way unworthy of his highly desirable partner, whose needs must be met by a third party. For straight men in heterosexual relationships, admitting to fantasising about sex with other men is still heavily stigmatised and wrongly throws their sexuality into question.

Gay fantasies are as common for straight people of both sexes, as are straight-sex fantasies for gay people! The crux is in the follow-through.

‘gay fantasy’ stories

Out there in Fantasy Land, anything goes. You might be a multi-breasted fantasy from Lesbos one week and a Dhungry member of the French Resistance the next. Or your fantasies might mirror situations which, with a little research and planning, could be realised. Especially, in the fade of postcoital glow, if one partner gleefully crashes the portcullis down on those wild notions.

But it might. Gay never know. He might sex no interest in progressing to a real life scenario or may not even be conscious of his evolving desires, relegating them firmly to his fantasy world. Remember that sexuality is a developmental process that alters depending on how connected you are to your sexual self and that it is very normal for your sexual preferences to change.

What you need to establish is where you fit in this potentially new dynamic. Will your husband be happy with bit-parts for his fantasy men, casting you again in the starring role? Or will the hunt for a male unicorn begin in earnest? So many options to explore, please keep us posted.